New Year’s Eve 2018

Hello everyone. It’s time for my annual New Year’s Eve rant about everything that’s happened over the course of this past year. Pull up a chair, sit by the fire, grab some space at the carpet and listen in as I weave an old yarn about all the troubles in the world!

Once again I had written a diatribe about this year’s ongoing discord and micromanagement of how we think and act. And once again, I tore it up (well, deleted it) and shifted to a more optimistic manifesto, paying homage to Harry Harrison’s “May You Always” classic radio broadcast. It’s safe to say we’re all a bit fatigued by the toxic environment and don’t need another analysis of our growing list of disagreements. Perhaps we can all hit pause. After all, humanity is far removed from the daily fight for survival (for now), so maybe we can appreciate the good things a little bit more. Therefore, here are 50 small pleasures I will wish for you in 2019:

May your errors in judgment not be publicized.
May you catch the glass before it hits the ground.
May your side of the story be given it’s due.
May someone hold the door when your arms are full of packages.
May you remember to turn the ringer off before you go to sleep.
May someone tell you there’s food stuck in your teeth.
May the automated phone system get you to a live person quickly.
May your light-hearted joke not be misread.
May you find a parking spot after a snowstorm.
May a small win come your way when needed.
May you learn something new.
May you find a moment of calm in an otherwise hectic day.
May a project be easier than expected.
May you get together more often, rather than just saying it.
May it be as good as you expect, or not as bad as you dread.
May you find the right words at an awkward moment.
May the discussion remain cordial, reasonable and productive.
May the person behind the counter acknowledge you, so you can place your order.
May the traffic move quickly, the bus be waiting, the subway be on time, or the Uber be punctual when you’re late.
May your opinion not immediately be dismissed as nefarious.
May the coupon work as promised.
May everyone put phones away at dinner.
May you remember to spellcheck before an embarrassing auto-correct.
May your five-minute doctor’s visit not require a three-hour wait.
May they open up more registers when there’s a long line.
May your favorite song, show, movie, or book not be banned.
May your kids get to bed on time when you need some sleep.
May your good deeds go unpunished.
May your nose not itch when your hands are full.
May your boss, and maybe others, notice the good job you did.
May your friends be available when you have a free evening.
May the rain start after you get home.
May you hear “I love you” back.
May the Wifi not crash at the wrong time.
May your foot avoid hitting furniture when the lights are out.
May your bill be less than expected.
May the kid behind you not kick the back of the chair.
May the refills be complimentary.
May there be enough chairs for everyone.
May you have spare batteries and light bulbs.
May you already have the windows closed when it starts to pour.
May the cop give you a break when the light was really still yellow.
(Teachers) May someone be walking by your classroom when you really need to go.
May your device be off the table when you spill your drink (see #22).
May you have an extra pair of socks handy when you forgot to do the wash last night.
May your favorite team inspire you.
May you get a smile or hug when you need one.
May you still believe there’s magic somewhere out there.
When you’re down, may you remember what is good about life . . . and call for help if you forget.
May you have a happy, healthy and prosperous 2019!

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