Hello everyone!  It’s New Year’s Eve again.  Gather ‘round the fire as Old Man Barcia rants about the world!

Before I begin, I must once again acknowledge the recent passing of my father.  He was a wonderful human being and I will miss him dearly.  I am drafting a separate blog post with a specific memory showing the kind of person he was, however I don’t want to rush it so it will be delivered at a later date after earning the attention it deserves.

This evening let’s all raise a glass for anyone we’ve sadly lost this year.

Now let the ranting begin.

Perhaps this post has an expiration date.  As I ponder the content, I wonder if I am simply regurgitating repetitive rubbish (cool alliteration, eh?).  It’s probably covered my every nugget of wisdom (that’s a pretty short list), and the originality is comparable with a CBS after-school program or 80s “special” episode (“Tonight, on a very special Blossom…”)

For starters I attempted to author a list of catchy one-liners, unfortunately failing to approach the genius of Yogi Berra or Oscar Wilde (leftover pop-culture observations follow at the end).  I also considered other routes:  a diatribe about AI’s conquest (The Matrix, The Terminator, or something else?); something about how we don’t really know each other; or an assessment of true happiness in modern times.  Another idea was a sad commentary about human nature (depressing way to conclude the year).  One post started with a cool line – “We are always taking medicine, but we never heal” – but the locomotive stalled at the gate.  Other gibberish doesn’t even earn a mention.

Many may eagerly anticipate the final episode.  “Ugh, another year of this!?!  When will he stop?”  Moving forward I will likely proclaim annually about not posting anymore, then contradicting my declaration by posting about not posting.  When my truly FINAL dissertation arrives, either forgive me if you look forward to it or breathe a sigh of relief it no longer invades your feed once a year.  So for this year’s list, I have crafted a few possible opening lines for the (planned or unplanned) requiem of my annual rant:

• Nothing more to post:  everything is fine, everyone gets along, and all world problems have been solved.
• Going for a three-hour tour on the Minnow – should be fun, and there will be a movie star on board!
• It says “To Serve Man”.  Well that’s nice.  I wonder what’s on the menu.
• Tired, so tired.
• Stopping by the Overlook next week to check on the caretakers; I am sure everything is fine.
• It’s the end of the world as we know it, and I feel . . . well, fine.  Who would’ve thought that?
• See you at the rendezvous point and Godspeed you make it.
• I’m too old for this . . . stuff.
• “Seven Days”; strange phone call eh?
• Drones are over my house.  Maybe they are spying on us, LOL.
• It seems we are switching to Bitcoin for the basis of US currency.  Let’s see how this goes.
• Who are those guys in black suits outside my apartment?
• Anyone ever hear of this place called Hotel California?
• I can’t believe the Jets won the Super Bowl!
• The national debt hit $100 trillion.  I guess we will just keep going until the economy collapses, hahaha.
• I bit into a York Peppermint Patty, and . . . now I don’t know where the hell I am!
• Headed down into the bank vault to sneak in a little reading.  I will finally have time, time enough at last.
• It’s 106 miles to Chicago, we have a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark, and we’re wearing sunglasses.
• I hope this post doesn’t offend anyone, but I need to get something off my chest…
• Trouble in tech world, I think Wifi is about to permanently go d———-
• Calgon is finally taking me away!
• Setting up HAL next week; this is gonna be great!
• It says I should put on the suit and the reindeer will know what to do.
• If just one more person says something false on social media I swear I am never posting again!
• I know the chicken was recalled, but it sure is tasty.
• Dr. Krippin said they had 10,009 successful trials.  Cool.
• What does this red button do?
• I did, in fact, do it my way.
• Look up at that asteroid in the sky.  I wonder which way it’s headed.
• He said red pill or blue pill.  Maybe he meant drowsy or non-drowsy?
• Sing it with me:  “Always look on the bright side of life.”
• Was that Elvis I saw leaving the building?
• Did anyone else notice the four guys on horses headed to Times Square?
• Ran into Ned Ryerson – that guy will do anything to get you to buy insurance.
• I’m so glad we had this time together, just to have a laugh, or sing a song.
• The fact that I am not posting should lead you to believe I am either:  A) not at home; B) home but don’t want to post; or C) home, desperately want to post, but trapped under something heavy.  If it’s C please call for help.
• They say it’s a “thing” that can imitate life.  Something the Norwegians dug out of the ice.  Sounds like another social media hoax.
• Goin’ to travel ‘round the world just you, and, me, Punk Rock Girl.
• Sorry, we’re closed.

As promised, some pop culture comments for your consideration:

• The Planet of the Apes is set down the Jersey Shore (notice Taylor’s trek at the end).
• Can we classify Psycho as a Christmas movie?  What about The Shining?  Count the days to the ending for both.
• If it was only a 106 miles to Chicago, why did the Blues Brothers need to drive all night?
• Keeping with The Blues Brothers:  The “Good Ole Boys” didn’t think to stop at a payphone and tell Bob’s Country Bunker they would be six hours late?
• The tidal Wave in The Day After Tomorrow originates in New Jersey.
• Why is there is huge spread of fresh desserts at the compound in Jurassic Park?  When the kids were lost, was Hammond’s first thought to have desserts prepared just in case they made it back?
• On October 1 will someone FINALLY wake up Billy Jo!?!
• At the end of The Goonies, how do they know the value of the gems in Mikey’s marble bag?  What if they were a bunch of fakes?
• Also in The Goonies, Mouth was able to fluently translate Spanish to create an elaborate hoax about the Walsh family, but it took him every ounce of energy and numerous repetitions to understand “Don’t sign”?
• Scrooge was given a chance at redemption – why not Marley?
• If was just Roger OR Rerun, would they then pay the rent?
• Finally, Billboard released a top artists of the 21^st Century list . . . 76 years early.  My level of interest highlights my standing as an anachronistic dinosaur.  Still, I challenge you compare it with top artists across the 20^th century and consider the state of current popular music.

Happy New Year everyone!